This is a test…

CHAPTER 8

I had a brief tryst with the porcelain human waste disposal unit this afternoon. It reminded me of my high school sweetheart relationships; it was unsatisfying and left me feeling empty inside. It was like a turbocharger had been melded to my colon, but I did get to read several chapters of the book that I picked up at the Gringo Book Store which is part of Casa Tranquille, a funky bed and breakfast place.

The book is named Refried Brains by Gil Gevins who transplanted to PV from New York 30 years ago. It’s clever, funny, and written with a large vocabulary and plenty of similes and metaphors to describe his zany scenarios. Each chapter is a story unto itself but some overlap in characters and incidents. It was recommended by a customer in the store but I almost put it down after reading the first of the back cover reviews. It said ‘ Not as good as his first book’  but then I read the second review ‘If you only read one book this summer, make Refried Brains number two’ and immediately knew it had potential. A few chapter titles are Why Possums Don’t Get Pimples, Hit the Roach Jack, and 20,000 Bowel Movements Under the Terrace.

I’m not sure where to point the finger of blame for my banishment to the bathroom. It could be pointing at YoYo Mo’s entrance where Dewey, a fellow Coritan, and I spent part of the evening playing pool and sampling some of the hops-based beverages that Mexico has to offer. Or it could stretch directly across the street to Jax Bar where we were seated on a pony wall rimming the outdoor seating area with about 100 others who were treated to a great rockin’ band comprised of a trio of talented local musicians. Consumsion of liquid Mexican culture also was on our to-do list as we stayed for most of 3 sets of music and gaiety.

Then it was a zig zag walk back to the hotel only to find the front gates locked. So we headed around the block and attacked the problem from the beach. Another locked gate but access was gained as we helped each other up a concrete wall and over the wrought iron fence atop it.

It didn’t inspire confidence in the hotel security if we 60-somethings could circumvent the barrier in a minute or so and the room doors can be opened with a butter knife (I’ve witnessed it myself). But that does leave the final protection of valuables as the room safe which is sturdy enough and has even kept me from gaining access a couple of times until we were saved by the hotel maintenance guy. It was a previous maintenance guy that opened our locked door, with the key inside, with the aforementioned kitchen utensil and taking only 10 seconds to do it.  The fact that we could be bludgeoned in our sleep was unlikely because there would be no profit in it and at our end of town there is nobody prowling the hotel sites except alcohol-sodden gringos trying to skulk home without causing a disturbance.

Now today is Wednesday and we’ve scoped out the area for almost 2 weeks so we can present options for Dale and Donna when they arrive tomorrow from snowy and cold Castlegar.

The plan was to arrive back in the ‘Gar with the snow all melted and lawn mower primed and ready to go but it is the polar opposite (pun intended) and they have been facing a wicked end to winter instead. Oh well, it shouldn’t last much longer.

Okay it’s now Thursday and we’ve  moved from our studio to a full blown 2 bed, 2 bath suite in one of their other buildings; it’s a big upgrade. There’s a kitchenette with plenty of counter space, balcony facing the bay and living area with 2 couches (albeit uncomfortable couches). All of the beds bear the Mexican stamp of comfort and could double as pool tables. The Graysons will be heading to Mega at the first opportunity to pick up a foamie for their bed.

I see a cab pulling up so D and D have arrived. More later.