Mexican 2 star hotel -Also commonly called a hovel. Quaint looking from the outside, usually with an accompanying pool that harbors parasitic larvae and the odd coconut. Ill fitting doors that allow geckos and bats easy access both above and below when closed. Bathroom sinks without plugs, shower heads which are calsified to only allow 3-4 streams of water to act as laser beams against sunburnt skin. Oh, and the beds…
racilla -an agave-based drink used primarily for neutralizing nuclear waste in cooling ponds. A local Mexican favorite for people who were breastfed by mothers who were also jalapeno testers and rendered their babes taste buds useless. Also used for ruining margaritas.
so-called family and friends -people who are too cultured or busy to comment on my blogs , also people who will be receiving a healthy dose of racilla in their Christmas stocking.
puffer fish -what a grapefruit would look like if it mated with a porcupine; occasionally killed by horses (Not sea horses, the full-size versions)
margs – commonly called margaritas, usually poured in quantities of 2; additional quantities induce napping, sometimes right at the serving table with a mouthful of guacamole
new friends – travelers, usually staying at the same hotel, who have something to offer and are easily manipulated with alcohol, ie: are willing to share their rental car, have discounted tickets to anything, bring their own tequila glasses to the pool area (with tequila), laugh at my jokes
collectivo -8 person van that can accommodate 15 persons plus livestock, usually piloted by a sweaty, overweight male that is very sociable, especially upon receiving payment, a wonderful source of entertainment
almost free -cheery come-on from beach vendors meant to induce interest in items such as wrestling masks, 60 lb. terracotta plant pots, over-sized shirts open to the navel with pink dolphins across the back
sombrero -casual headwear often associated with beach-side bar patrons and tourists who have just disembarked their aircraft and are almost out of the airport. Primary function is to protect the back of the neck so it is a lighter hue of lobster red compared to the rest of the body.
Blue Delivery 