Travel info meter set to 91% Poking fun at Ted meter set to high Monday June 5 Breakfast is included with this apartment and Eleonora replenishes our supplies during the day at an appointed time and then emails us to make sure we’re happy and offers to line up rental cars (NOOOOOOOO!!) or whatever she might do to help us have the best stay possible.
Today we are going to hit the road with T & V . First we need to load up on carbs for the grueling day ahead. We went to our usual choice of toast with cream cheese and jam, yogurt, fresh fruit, juice, small cakes and pastries, washed down with espresso. I make my usual oinking sound as I push away from the table, but also as usual Carol is not amused and heads for the washroom and I to our (my) tablet to get my creative juices flowing and maybe have a short nap to work off breakfast.
Those of you who know Ted at all acknowledge that he has his own style, which he stubbornly defends to retain, and he is ALWAYS late. Our prearranged time to meet in the parking lot below the funicular was 9:30, so we left our place at 9:00 and arrived at 9:20 and waited on a bench. An email comes saying it will be 9:45, then another for 10:00, and they roll into the parking lot promptly at 10:17 with accusations from both of who was responsible, but we know who is responsible; Veronica is perfect, Ted is imperfect.
Veronica lived in the Orvieto area for a number of years and her 2 boys attended school here so she is well acquainted with the driving situation, but she will be navigating from the rear as her and Carol exchange news and Ted and I are up front. I resign myself to the fact that due to Ted’s lack of focus because he needs to keep his lips moving in case they atrophy I will act as interpreter for Veronica and pass instructions to the driver (what could go wrong with that?).
The roads are windy, signage is an unknown quantity, town names a quagmire of vowels and consonants that even Bob Einstein couldn’t organize them into meaning. Oh ya, the signs sometimes point in an ambiguous direction but it still demands a snap decision and Ted has decided that he is qualified to drive at 50% above the speed limit at all times (yup, no problem here).
It is magnificent countryside that we pass through (at breakneck speed) on our way to Civita Bagnoregio which was founded by the Etruscans about 500 BC. It is a veritable newcomer to the area as the Etruscans worked at Orvieto in 700 – 600 BC. so they are the Johnny-Come-Lately of their culture scene.
In about a half hour Ted is parking the car and we are trekking down, down to the upgraded bridge that leads up, up to Civita. There are no steps just a severe grade to climb, but as it turns out that is the easiest way to reach the top as stairs take a greater toll on your legs (as we found out later).
We opted for the audio tour that was available and it made the brief trip around the village much more meaningful with descriptions and history of the church, local squares, defensive positions, and even the jail. After a little more than hour we are heading back down the bridge and then up the other side to the car park.
Everyone uses their phones as cameras in this day and age because of the quality, portability, and weight savings; everyone that is except Ted. Although masterful with his Nikon it still takes double the time to set all of the settings for each photo op when most can be corrected, colorized, and effects added later through an app without the nuisance that a beast like his brings to the table. So he typically is bringing up the rear whenever we go somewhere.
Ted’s typical uniform (they were limited in what they could bring, like us) would be a golf shirt, sometimes with a company logo (so it would have been free), tucked into shorts held up by a belt, mid-calf socks, sometimes with sandals if he was trying to emulate an Austrian postal worker, or a better look had him wearing runners to give him that Cleveland, OH look that’s popular in rural Kentucky. His hair and glasses look like early 21st century so it is an upgrade.
I, on the other hand, usually wear solid color t-shirts that show off my drooping chest and noodle arms, but at least they are past my waist line and help disguise the 5 extra pounds that I’m packing over the 5 extra pounds that I carry normally. I spent huge before we started on a pair of khaki pants and a snug-fitting pair of shorts that gives me that Chechnyan look that so many people are hungering for these days.
Veronica had a full assortment of clothes and accessories and was styling as only an Italian can. Carol also had clothing options that she was able to change up and add to that always kept me interested, if you know what I mean. In reality nobody is paying us any attention as tourists are so common they are not to be acknowledged unless they’re holding a 50€ note at the checkout counter.
After our mountaintop experience we headed for Lake Bolsena just another 30 minutes away in what should have been a 20 minute drive but I took it upon myself to direct Ted up a mountain road through a little town as we were looking to go downhill to the lake. Hey, some lakes are on mountaintops like Summit Lake and Lake Mountaintop. Anyways, Ted managed to work past my help and we ended up at Lake Bolsena, the largest volcanic lake in Europe. It’s a wonderful stop with some overpriced local wares but good bar and food choices.
Veronica acted as our guide and interpreter at every venue and we certainly commanded more respect than we normally generate. Plus we didn’t end up with snail larvae and chitlins like we might have if I was ordering off the menu. Ted had beer.
Soon enough our day was coming to a close and Ted was winging us back to our starting point so they would have enough time to close out their time with family and prepare for their eventual 4 AM departure to the airport to return to their rental car in France and continue on with their holiday. It was a fantastic time together and more memories were made that bind the 4 of us. We had spent time together in Mexico just 7 months ago. Who knows where we’ll meet the next time?
Adios brave comrade, stay safe and keep your chin off the pavement.
We did our usual ritual and spent part of the evening on the terrace with me deleting most of the pictures that I’d taken because my thumb was over the lens or they were of my shoes or the sky. Carol retired to her book and we closed another chapter in the Days of our Lives.
Blue Delivery 